my twin’s in town!

today was supposed to be my alone day but lauranne popped by from KL and so i spent half of my day with her! (= came back, felt utterly sick, slept the other half away. goodness-

but anyway feels good to be semi out of touch with the world. made it a point to not reply any messages today (half failed. haha)

we went to central mall and there was this promotion going on, spend 50bucks and redeem a love lock. its basically a lock with a heart shape acrylic thingy and u write ur love message on it and lock in onto this metal stand outside central mall. two of us excited girls got our receipts and redeemed a love lock and we locked our love there!!! by far the corniest thing i’ve ever done – we were saying we would never have done that with our boyfriends, if we had. post up pictures later

tzelin, another dear in my life, thanks for everything, sharing your heart, lending your ears, sharing your life with me…. your support and concern is always so timely!! (‘=

had reggae today. do you guys know……. carol, who stepped in for gin today (gin was having very very bad sore eyes) she is even more petite than me. she is shorter, and smaller in size, but dang, SHE CAN MOVE!! she’s got the power, yo. awesome inspiration. small person with loud voice and actions!!

im really fallin’ in love with reggae seriously. we spent quite a huge part of the lesson on isolations and isolations and isolations continually from chest to hips, and tzelin and i we were simply enjoying doing the techniques and exercises so much. basics are always important… the super good dancers spend an insane amount of time on doing seemingly the most insignificant things.. like bounces, and isolations, and conditioning. but without those basics, you don’t get far. (sounds familiar? =D)

i thank God that He made me dance. everytime i go into class feeling like anything but high, i come out feeling on top of the world. beginning to understand how the phrase “dance to express” really applies to me. nobody’s lookin, nobody cares, u’re just doing ur thing and u’re just u. that’s my trade, i love it. it’s something that actually makes me feel completely independant and strong. wheehee.

tgif tomm!! am gonna plan my weekend properly and have my Sabbath. it’s been a while since i had some good alone time. recharge!!!

people who matter

had a simple dinner sitting at parkway playground with my lifegroup today. bought food, sat together, enjoyed the breeze, talked and laughed at anything and everything, while some tired people stoned… haha. it is such bliss to share life with these friends.

on my way sending my dear sheep home, was sharing to her about my day and my struggles, she suddenly gripped my shoulder and said “be strong okay chia, we are following you“. that simple statement had so much impact at that moment i suddenly realised what great responsibility lies on my shoulder. God called me to be His steward.

in the short 3 seconds i was pondering upon that statement, the lovely girl suddenly affirmed me again
“but don’t worry. you’re not alone. we’re not alone, too.“

thanks rochelle, thanks for sharing in my life, for understanding my struggles, and trusting me to fulfil my responsibilities well. it means alot ><

just now as i ran down to the kitchen to get a drink, i was just thinking… honestly this bunch of people are not easy to lead =x generally dealing with people always paves your way for trouble, for hurts, disappointments.. but on the other side of the coin, i am so blessed by each of them because every week when i meet them up, seeing how they have grown that little bit through the week, sharing in their battles and victories, in their struggles and failures, in their joy and sorrows, in their lives – gosh, i feel so so so privileged to be there with them!!

thank you jcea4, my friends, my kids =p, my lovely brothers and sisters for your commitment towards this family, this church, and persisting in running towards God together despite our differences. i’ve never been more proud to be able to lead and serve you guys, and i still think, i have the awesomest job in the world! i so appreciate each one of you, really really really.

[althea] thanks for availing yourself to God despite the busyness of your internship… your support adds oil to me!! especially when you so selflessly lend your enthusiasm and excitement to perk up the group even after a long day at work.. friend, you rock!! next up, carwash project!!

[celeste] rochelle so intelligently summed you up in a phrase – “you emit tired vibes i feel tired talking to you”. LOL! i’ve seen ur cui-est and ugliest moments…. (don’t remind me, right). thanks for trusting my advice and always keep trying again when you don’t hit the bar.. cos that’s so not you? to do something you don’t feel like doing. you are a powerful struggler, too!

[rochelle] your words of encouragement always ALWAYS always come to timely to me.. and thanks for always nagging at me about my unhealthy sleeping and diet habits like a mother. it shows that you care, right? (hopefully!) can see how you keep striving to obey God in your life.. jiayou la dear, all things are possible! yes, you’re not alone (=

[brian] thanks for being the faithful loanshark… collecting money and doing the admin stuff. no you’re not exactly the most organised person i know of, but you are doin’ a great job (= i really appreciate how you rush down for lifegroup every wednesday after ur training ends. not the most happening periods of the day.. i know how tiring it is. God sees ur heart!! thanks for everythg (what we spoke about last camp )

[tianlong] $30 is not a very big amount of money, but thanks for offering ur talent to the kingdom. its a great testimony! continue to win alot of calligraphy competitions… know your finances are pretty tight. God will not shortchange you!! yes you don’t talk alot, but i see you make more efforts nowadays! way to go!! so proud of you bro!

[zhengkai] the most childlike person i’ve ever met. your conversion goal was “as many as possible” and i knew you were so full of faith and want to do so much more for God. your simple, childlike comments and questions at times really make me wonder how sophisticated i’ve become at times =x get well soon btw!!!

[jiajin] the loudest, naughtiest, craziest person in this group. really wanna kick your ass and stab you at times!!! but okay… thanks for bringing so much joy into my life.. and for asking questions everytime you don’t understand something. this shows that u really care and are interested in all those things. jiayouuu… all those things we’ve been talking about for weeks? there’ll be breakthroughs.

each of you are so God-sent. thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you and thank you. for serving God together with me, and for being willing to be discipled. i am sure God is smiling at you guys. way to go, jcea4!!

just the beginning of the year.. .greater things are yet to come!! [seventeen+!!] let’s continue to fast and pray faithfully and depend on God okay!! will post up more of my learnings soon, too.

randomz.

i realised this one thing… that girls emotions are very powerful things. powerful….. and scary, too.

i always knew that emotions are a major thing in my life, but today i understood how it is like to actually struggle against it.

boy, it’s tough.

i’d love if i could zap myself out of such situations or feelings… but okay, not possible. bible says there are things that war against our souls… and i feel every bit fighting a battle now.

crap, i actually wanna stick knives and swords into the emotional side of me right now and kill it right away. haha yes tough but i’m ready to put up the fight. cmon, bring it on whateverrrr.

have you ever felt like this? like there were two sides to you. one side i’m feeling weak and helpless, yet the other strong and determined? hurrrr.

my source of strength is in You alone.

end of Jan2010

barely into the second month of 2010 and i’m already feeling all burned out.

thank God for the holy spirit in my life… He always brings my attention to the things i fail to notice. my blind spots. my character flaws. my hidden motives. thursday made me realise many things, and i’m packing up my baggages now.

i think the same baggages are weighing me down physically, emotionally and spiritually it’s kinda zapping my energy, but with that strength i’ve left, i’ll not allow these baggages to follow me into the new week, the new month, tomorrow.

no pain, no gain. rightzzz. was telling some close people that these are the kind of things that you can’t blame other people for. i’m responsible for my own struggles, responsible to make my own choices, responsible to take care of things in my own life. if i don’t take ownership and leadership, who else would?

tomorrow’s a new day, new love, new strength, new journey! i will say this yet again: i am struggling powerfully.

*on a side note,

i rejected * and this has just officially become one of my greatest motivations to be muggerfied and up my cap this sem. no regrets chia, no regrets!

okaaaay. back to life.