not for the boys

i think menses cramps are the worst kind of pain that a girl can ever ever experience… besides childbirth maybe. for the first time in my life today the annoying pain actually drove me into madness. after 3 hours of battling with the pain and making the a-bit-lag-but-still-quite-smart choice of taking the trusty pink panadol, and alot of TLC from my friends and mum and granny, i feel much much much better now ^^

i feel so loved <3 <3 <3 but all these people that God put in my life. seriously without’em…what would i do!!! my mum sends me to school every morning. she goes out for breakfast, then she comes back to pick me up so that i can sleep in later. today she did the same thing. and came back to pick me to my granny’s place when i had my pains. my wonderful mummy. she tried to soothe my pain by rubbing my tummy… seriously. i felt so loved!! not like she doesn’t work. she works, family business la, but its like, for me she’s running around like crazy!!! )’: then my granny warmed the hotpack and put it on my tummy. and she flipped it a few times over so that it stays warm. and she talked to me,rubbed my tummy and all that….. all this for a stupid little girl >:(! just now i sms-ed my mum to thank her.. she replied me:

“Hey u r my girl….”

….. !!! )’: I AM SO LOVED!!

and my dad. he secretly wants to come school and fetch me every night after i study even though he always say i should take bus home myself. i know it! and my korkor sends me whenever he can, and he’s not obligated at all anyway.

*sniff sniff*

thank you sheng and teresa <3 btw. they’re really sweet (sorry for taking up ur study time anyway!!) (: thank you jasmine loh huey huey for being my amazing and loving shepherd and always praying and being so concerned for my stupid weak body!! thank you kang and dennis, but i can’t share the pain with ya’ll.

im back to studying. thank God for everything today, i think there’s always another side to the story, thank God i got cramps today, not monday when papers start. to everyone else mugging, AJA AJA FIGHTING!!!

6 days to As

i observed that this Alevels period either makes people jittery, superrrr angsty, becoming more self-centered, feel helpless…. amazing how the devil uses exams to mess you up.

but God uses exams too. He uses exams to help you draw closer to Him, He uses exams to show that He gives peace! He uses exams to show that well, what’s beyond my control is within His control (; do you remember who your God is?

i gotta say, Alevels has 100000x amount of stress and workload compared to Olevels. and i do admit at some point in time these few weeks i’ve lost my temper, been overcome by stress, felt like being selfish at times, was selfish at times…. i don’t even want to go on. but thank God for forgiveness. and thank God for peace. somehow, there’s this quiet little peace within me … that i know when i do my best, God will do his best.

and God’s best isnt dependant on my best. His best, is His best

 

(a little incoherent !! i need to sleep )

exams in life

that day Jesus poked me hard and challenged my status quo

so what if I score well for As, but fail to grow in God this period of time?

does it matter? Alevel results will get me into university, while spiritual growth prepares me for the rest of my eternity. … you do the math.

i remembered seeing somewhere someone wrote something about exams, and i took it into my own context. Alevel’s doesn’t start on 3rd Nov when i go into the exam hall. it ends there. my Alevels is now, it is how disciplined i am in preparing for my papers, it is the choices i make in prioritising all aspects of my life, it is the obedience i give to God when He asks me to follow Him. my exam is now, and i don’t want to fail it.

i’ve been talking to people about the consequence of not doing well for As – probably can retake the papers again, study harder and score all the As you need on ur cert. but if you fail the exam of life? i don’t want to think about that……………

so glad Jesus gives second chances. BUT STILL, i don’t wanna toy with the idea of getting a big ugly Fail on my report card from God. and i believe, i will reap God’s result when i do my life God’s way.

all the wayyyyyyy~~~!!!

Great Expectations

‘ “It is no easy for even you,” said Estella, “to know what satisfaction it gives me to see those people thwarted, or what an enjoyable sense of the ridiculous I have when they are made ridiculous. For you were not brought up in that strange house from a mere baby. – I was. You had not your little wits sharpened by their intriguing against you, suppressed and defenceless, under the mask of sympathy and pity and what not that is soft and soothing. – I had. You did not gradually open your round childish eyes wider and wider to the discovery of that imposter of a woman who calculates her stores of peace of mind for when she wakes up in the night. – I did.”

.
.
.

Her reverting to this tone as if our association were forced upon us and we were mere puppets, gave me pain; but everything in our intercourse did give me pain. ‘

 

after 1 year 10 months, and 4 weeks before Alevels, I AM FALLING IN LOVE WITH GREAT EXP!
(hope it isnt too late for exams; but whatever it is, i’m loving Pip and Estella and everything I’m reading currently ^^)

farewell assembly

farewell assembly was an awesome affair! kudos to all the teachers and the juniors for the programme. this year mr chan kept his speech really short sweet and sharp. i guess one of the least boring speeches he ever made in these 2 years… haha. anyway i really applaud miss sharon wong for presenting a christian song before the whole school to encourage us despite all that hoo-ha in school about the “we are happy, ask us why” posters. im guessing her song presentation (btw she sang Voic of Truth, accompanied by a clip from Facing the Giants) must have definitely elicited some dissatisfied responses from the atheist kids around school. (sensitive topic at the moment, lets move on) but it was an apt timing, funny how God uses people to encourage you. i admit i got abit emo-nemo in the middle of the video and the song okay………. but i could feel the the sincerity from her. she makes a good gp tutor (:

some ’synchronised swimming’ item the teachers put up. several pairs of legs shot up after that….. belonged to the guy teachers. horrific. i squeezed boon’s arm when seet suddenly popped up from the cloth……  honestly got a shock.

mr josef tan and his counterparts dressed up as pompom boys doing their cheerleading thing. the best was mr yong….. but sadly i have no photos. they looked like they enjoyed the whole thing! vj teachers have this thing for cross-dressing… i still remb last teachers day a few of’em GUYS dressed up as getai singers with pink tube dresses and mini neon skirts, all thanks to 881.

the teachers’ band! it’s the same people every year, but i’m still impressed because my beloved CT is the lead singer! we got really quite high swaying and bouncing and singing away to their rendition of “This Love”, okay maybe just my group of people. the rest of the students were like stoning. bummer.

there you go, the guy who was on stage. MR NAJIB IF YOU EVER READ THIS: you’re the best CT-cum-geography tutor i’ve ever had in my two years in VJ! >:D we are your first civics class, and i think you did a greaaat job. way to go!

anw, my tutor is so hip. we have human geog consultations on skype! it’s a new thing he says. haha.

moving on:

my wonderful class, probably the most harmonious class i’ve ever been in. 2 distinct cliques but we never have conflicts. peace loving baby (:

our half of the class, and the orange neon watches from phoenix house comm (:

miss jency. or better known as the lady who takes care of all the administrative work in the college and after all these years never fails to run around the college in her heels. she’s really power okay. she takes care of the catered dinner from thaipan every evening, and im amazed at how she works around her desk. do you ever notice the piles of documents and files at her cubicle!? she’s amazing!!

and of course not forgetting our friendly security guard uncles! whooo love’em to the max. they are seriously friendly guards, and i remember the uncle (the one on the right) caught this little stray bird and took care of it, but died in the end cos it got banged down by a car when it tried to fly and he was super miserable about it.

 

so alrighttttt. that’s about it. more photos on my facebook (:

and no lah, i never cry today. haha. it was such a happy assembly nobody got mood to cry please!! and i have school from 8am – 5pm everyday next week. remedials are worst than school timetables please. if i were to cry, it’ll be because of my study week….